At last.

I have outsmarted the website. Now I have no idea what I was going to write about however... But hey, now I can start posting again. For better or for worse.

Kylian

Je suis de retour!

My blog is reborn!

In light of being.. house-ridden. I am going to start blogging again, also because I read Liam's blog and felt he needed company in the comunity. However I do not have many things to write about today. But I will try my best to improvise some text.

Alright well, my new Hero (first hero really) is officially David Belle. Creator of parkour, martial arts extrodinair and actor... is there anythign he cant do? I'd like to think so but it doesnt seem that way. Everyday I get restless and jumpy because I wanna go out and train like a madman but my broken hand is stopping me from all progress. Gar.. I still go to Attadore once in a while to learn how to do standing backflips and wall-run flips (which I can almost do both) so I suppose not all is lost.

As far as everything else.. since this.. hand.. incident things have gotten better at stock. Nikki and I seem to have an understanding now and is being alot warmer towards me. As well as very much required pazzaz pep talks by Jim, things seem to be looking up for the summer somewhat. I just re-read that paragraph and realised I said as far as EVERYTHING else goes and started talking about stock... sad. Well anyway stock is NOT everythign else. Rehearsing with my brothers to sing at kents farewell, its going well, we sound pretty good. I don't know if anybody would be too stocked about coming to my church with all my anti-christ friends! But it would be sweet if some of you came, kent would appreciate the gesture and I would like it if you guys saw me sing... because you know i don't really do it often.

Also putting alot of time into choregraphing this crazy movie kent and I are making. Man, it is going to be so good... but it will be hard to pull off well, this choreography is really tricky. We're just going ot have to shoot it over the course of a few days... pretty bad improv for this post but hey.. gotta write something.

Kylian

PS: Selling my car for 1,000 bucks... know anyone who wants it let me know. =P

Thanks...

Hey guys. I do feel alot better since that night. and reading your responses have also made me feel pretty good.

The night at Jakis really wasnt the reason I felt so bad that night, I'm sorry I distorted some of the things that happened that evening with Liam and Kevin. I love you guys.

Hell, I love everyone which I guess is why I was so down by the idea that was going through my head at the time. Thanks for proving me wrong.

Kylian

Friends....?

So here it goes, it is currently 4:36 in the AM and im not tired in the slightest. I have a harsh stream of depression that is hitting me so I'm going to rant for a bit about what is bugging me.

I don't know that i have very many real friends. I look around and realise no one takes me seriously, and deep down, i dont think that many people like me. I realised recently that most of the people the I call friends don't really see me as anything but that loud, crude guy who makes terrible jokes about inappropriat things... well for the most part its true i suppose. But i have reached out many times to all of these people that I truly love, to get to know them better and for them to get to know me for who I really am... but it apears no one is interested. I care so much about everyone but I think if I were to cut all my ties here in calgary, the only reason people would REALLY notice is that I wouldn't be around to drive. No one really talks to me, im just there for entertainment.

Tonight i was here to hang out with some friends (jakis) I had fun... but when it came to the end of the evening I was just in everyones way. One ecample of this is i tried joking around while half asleep while watching hercules, getting rather negative responses I moved upstairs to go to sleep where kevin and liam shortly came upstairs and I quote kevin on this "oh my fucking god, kylian is here" I took the hint and went back downstairs where pretty much every other surface was taken and i didnt really feel like squishing in with them at this point. In my rather unhappy mood i wanted to go home but my keys were nowhere to be found.. i search for them for a good hour and no one knows where they are. I go to leave and nobody cares all that much... its too cold for the bike... i come back in and walk around for another 2 hours... and now this.

I can't sleep... and i wasn't planning on posting this really... but I thought I should prove my point by posting it. Because I don't beleive anyone will read this and care all that much, if I'm wrong. Please prove me wrong because this is one of those times where I hope I am.

Again, heres me sounding very fuckin emo... hell i feel pretty fuckin emo.